It was a pleasant evening unlike the rainy morning . Due to heavy rains schools were closed and Sivaa was anxious as to the sudden changes in his routines. It was a fact that children were getting bored and I was not able to equip them smoothly as I would be during other vacation holidays. Seeing the pleasant climate in the evening I sent both of them outside to play. Siddhu pedaled his cycle two – three times and ran to his friends house. Sivaa wanted to walk alone through our lane and sensitize himself with his fidgeting tool -the long green grass. I was watching them closely like a life guard thinking of jumping on to life saving situations. But soon my neighbor walked to me for a chit chat. While we were talking, another lady who was known to both of us came in between and we were engaging in a conversation. Suddenly Sivaa ran to us and peeped in to the carry bag the other lady was holding. It wasn’t just peeping, he literally pulled his hands and searched the other ladies plastic carry bag. She was embarrassed and so am I, never expected such a quick response from him and I decided to deal with it.

I asked him to come inside. He was little hesitant and agitated with my decision to take him in. I was very clear with my stand. He soon came inside. I told him the reason why he was taken inside and he gave me the eye contact till I finished it. I understood that he was getting to what I was communicating . I wanted him to apologize to me saying he won’t repeat this and everytime I asked him to say that he kept saying I will do this. This was not happening through Avaz. He was talking. At times he is verbal as I had already mentioned and mostly it happens when he’s panicked. Finally I lost to it and I ended up feeling so bothered with his behavior.

Soon Siddhu came home and I told him as to what had happened in his absence. He as always consoled me saying that it’s OK and next time Chettan won’t repeat it. Since I was completely lost at that moment, I shouted at siddhu saying this is not the first time Chettan is showing this behavior and he would repeat it again. Siddhu is always Sivaas best advocate and he would convince us somehow with his pros and cons about the topicSoon it was nearing to their time to visit temple and both of them took bath and was all set ready to go to temple. I didn’t talk to Sivaa and I completely avoided him two – three times when he headed for a conversation with me through Avaz and otherwise. Siddhu holded his brothers hand and marched towards the temple. After 20minutes they reached back and as I expected Siddhu was praising his brothers behavior all through the journey in and out the temple. I just told him that I was happy for his brother. By that time, I had made their evening snacks and both ate well. I could see Sivaa was more happy as it was one of his favorite item but I didn’t bother to acknowledge it. I switched on the TV and as I was watching the news updates, Sivaa ran to me and gently holded my face and turned it towards his side and said a sorry and ran back. It was so quick that I couldn’t feel it completely. Hearing that sorry…Siddhu ran to Sivaa and kissed him.

But at the end of the day , I’m so happy as a mother for those little things that life put me to deal with and it’s memorable outcomes.Maybe Sivaa might have understood his mistake or maybe Siddhu might have dealt with it and in anyways it’s heart warming for a mother and I would cherish this beautiful moment.

And about the title

Siddhu wanted to hear a story and sleep today, to which I told him that I’m going to write one story and he was curious to know what the story was about. I told him it was about Sivaa and his behavior today to which he wanted to give this title.

Don’t be bad and make your loved ones sad.

Regards,

Preetha Anoop Menon

Siddhu was very excited after school. He showed me his diary. It was written fried rice with curry for lunch day after tomorrow in school Canteen. With an innocent smile on his face, he asked are you not Surprised… I knew this question would follow immediately. So I acted well in advance with a popped up surprised face and added Wow to it… He was very happy seeing my expression and he said he wants to go for it. But I knew he is not a foodie and he doesn’t like fried rice and that too vegetable one. Keeping all this in mind I asked him, do you actually want to go for it ? Amma knows that you don’t like veg fried rice much. Then What tempted you to try this? He replied very eagerly that his friend is trying this and he said it’s yummy.. And Teacher also said it’s so tasty and delicious.So his statement made everything clear that he wanted to enjoy a day in canteen with his friends… He added that If it’s raining they will be taken to canteen in school van and inside canteen they have to take the plates and wait for their turn and has to pay money on their own for the food served to them. All these were an added attraction despite the above statement.

But since it was little pricey than his ordinary canteen coupon I asked him to get permission from Acha. Thereby I sensibly passed on the ball to Anoops court who was nowhere in the seen.Siddhu is yet to get permission from Anoop but still I have made up my mind that he is going to enjoy the fried rice with his friends tomorrow. Then why did I ask him to get his father’s permission? I just want to make him understand that it’s not his priority and also to make him know that it has more value than his usual canteen meals.

But surprisingly I came to read about a few discussions that happened in one of his school group’s where this has been dealt as some marketing strategies used by the school. Maybe…. But don’t you also feel that every where your child is subjected to this strategy right from their birth. So marketing has become an inevitable part of our daily life. How do you deal with is most important thing.

From a very young age like he was 4 and half I used to teach him how money comes and who earns money in our house and how difficult it is. Slowly I taught him why I’m not able to work like other mom’s he see around. When I was saying all these to him, I didn’t know it was all registering in his brain. Believe me, a child’s brain is the only store which captures and assess information so fast. One day he wished to have a new cycle because his old cycle was damaged and one irritating sound was coming out of it was fulfilled by us. But when he went to cycle shop, he wanted to have a cycle with gears but that was questioned and neglected. Instead we surprised him with a bottle fixer attached to his cycle. He was super thrilled and happy with that. Later one day when he stood first for English story telling competition Ramayana, he wished to have a magic Matte pencil to improve his hand writing, we knowingly fulfilled his wish that no pencil can do magic. I’m also that mother who check his pencil box daily to know whether he has missed any of them. But sometimes I feel like I’m the old school mom or gen X . I never allow him to use any of our phones as his screen time. I hate to see children playing video games in mobiles and also seeing them watching YouTube videos. Hearing music is the only thing that is allowed in our house because Sivaa doesn’t know any other activities to pass on with when he has nothing to do. I thought I was right..but surprisingly last week when I was sitting for a doc’s appointment for myself where I actually got time to engage myself to know what was happening outside. I was sitting near to a Paed Ward and I saw almost all children were fidgeting with mobile phones. Those other sections were eating or holding a biscuit packet or chocolate. Oh God … I didn’t see any child who was sitting ideally doing nothing. If a child cannot sit ideally for half an hour in a place doing nothing what are we trying to teach this younger generation..So back to the topic if it’s genuine and cause no harm, why can’t we fulfill their little wishes. I strongly believe that giving your child your smart phone to engage with is more dangerous than eating a lunch in school canteen.

Open for discussion.

World of neuro typical

Regards

Preetha Anoop Menon

This is a very common question we hear from many like minded people’s, families and friends as we row the boat of autism. This question is haunting me from quite a long time as how can someone actually help me. Being a co founder to TogetherWeCan, I know one of our objects is to empower the families of persons with disabilities. But ‘how’ was the question pondering for a very long time. Let me quote a small incident that happened to us a few days back

It was a Sunday and we had a guest very unexpectedly. We were planning to go to my father’s place. Soon we need to change our plan and I invited the guest in a most appealing manner. We welcomed them with a juice and some snacks. I knew Sivaa would also expect the same or else there’s every chance of him grabbing from guests plate. In order to avoid the situation I gave Sivaa also a portion served. Soon it became 11.30 and the guest wanted to see my father and go back before Lunch. So our plan for going out for lunch and then to father’s place was soon cancelled and we headed to See my father who was leaving 10kms away from my place. He is all alone in the house and one of my aunt cooks for him. As soon as we reached the house, my dad wanted to welcome them again with tea and snacks, Soon I went inside the kitchen and made Tea for everyone. Unexpectedly and without any demands I gave the second batch of snacks with no time gap to Sivaa. Already there happened a lot of changes in Sivaas schedule and I didn’t want to embarrass the guest with his behaviours by suddenly saying a NO. After the tea and a chit chat with my dad the guest went off.

But by that time it became 1 o’clock and my aunt came with lunch for my dad and he was all set ready to eat. I knew that with Sivaa he wouldn’t be able to have a peaceful lunch, so I had no option left than to take him out for lunch. Sivaa couldn’t eat anything because his stomach was not ready for that. Back from restaurant we spend a little more time with my dad and finished some household chores which is expected from me and came back home late evening. By that time Sivaa was super hyper and was running around the house. We didn’t have time or energy to spend with either of the children because I need to prepare dinner and Anoop had to buy some daily errands and he even helped me in preparing dinner. By 9 we were all ready to go to bed, hoping for a peaceful sleep to start with busy weekdays. Anoop had to go to Kannur early morning as a part of his work schedule. But Sivaa surprised us by not sleeping and was awake till 3. It was a very rare occurrence. Next day I couldn’t send him to school and I had to cancel my plans for the day.

But what could be reason as to why he was awake for so long? It can either be because of the unstructured day or because of change in room as the other room A\c was not working. But definitely changing the room is not for the first time. It happens at times. Or it could be because of some other reason to which I have no clue

This incident is not the one such incident but it’s just among the thousand incidents we parents face and would get stranded out in the middle. Does prioritising the situation for Sivaa work here? I really don’t know. I could have woke up Sivaa as usual and would have send him to school but there was 99% chance that I would get a call from school. Or on the other side, knowing him I shouldn’t have changed his pattern or schedule. But does that really work? Or as an option I shouldn’t have entertained guests. Then what inclusion are we aiming at? Again I could have stopped myself from giving the second set of untimely snacks but as I told the guest was unexpected and teaching something at a different place(dads place) would be totally out of question and very difficult. And finally requesting my 72 year old dad to extend his lunch time further would be out of place, unfair and very judgemental.

But it’s a bitter truth that Anoop and I got exhausted, tired and lost out without any help. At times I don’t understand as to how someone would be able to help us. Whom should we ask for help? What help was needed at that time? Really what inclusion and acceptance are we talking about …I always tell my brother and my sister as nobody understands our journey. But they very lovingly reply to me as to please let them understand my journey but it seems very complicated and unwired that I find myself difficult to pause and ask for help.

Yes my child is my priority. But does that also mean I should restrain my feelings and responsibilities as a daughter. So to conclude… We can help you is sometimes very Sarcastic. You can’t…It’s different journey.

Regards

Preetha Anoop Menon

Part 2

Avaz is my Voice

When I decided to buy Avaz for Sivaa, I had no choice left than to try this last option for my so called non verbal boy. I owe to Smrithy Rajesh for empowering parents like me who were actually struggling with communication difficulties of their children.

Smrithy Rajesh is a parent and special educator. You can reach her through

smrithyrajesh.blogspot.in

In this moment, when Sivaa started to use Avaz as a communication tool, I’m thinking how much I would have missed him and how little I would have understood about him, if I didn’t try Avaz for Sivaa

I would not have actually understood that Sivaa need a voice.

When I started customizing Avaz app, I used Siddhus sound for expressing some Malayalam words. But I was surprised to see that he wouldn’t answer or touch those folders as he has already recognized himself to a English child’s voice. By resonating to that English child he made it very clear that he wanted a sound different from three of us.

I would have taken him for granted.

He was very clear with his choices after we introduced Avaz. Earlier it was always Tea for Sivaa but now there are days where Sivaa would opt for Boost or Bournvita. Music was played only during music time but now he made me understand that he needs music whenever he has nothing to do. Last day he was not well and didn’t go to school, so he made me hear his playlists for 2 hours and I actually had to beg him to stop it. Video has been attached.

Through Avaz I learned to respect his dignity.

His choices are very abstract and very clear. He made me understand that ‘No’ is always a ‘No’ eventhough I’m his mother and he is my child. I usually say this to Siddhu but has never thought from his angle. When I expects my neuro typical to do something and if he says ‘No’ then that’s the end. I use all my powers and authority as a mother. But when Sivaa.. The neuro divergent and the one who taught me unconditional love started saying ‘No’ to my demands, I started respecting his dignity.

This para can be misinterpreted but I feel at times it’s okay for a child to say No, if parent knows to draw a line between what can be No and what cannot be No..

Avaz as a communication tool is creating a joyous and loving bond between us.

Last day I was talking to my neighbor and Sivaa knew that if she comes I would forget everything and spend hours chatting to her. He was quiet for the first 20minutes and after that he came with Avaz and tapped the sitting folder and too much sound folder two to three times. I soon quit the chit chat session and entered the house. It sounded like I’m sitting here and I could not withstand your loud sound. And on an another day my mother in law called me for a casual talk, hearing the phone bell, he ran from the other room with Avaz and tapped the clock folder. It was a reminder to check the time as it was nearing to his snacks time. So before the next warning bell, my poor mum in law, kept the phone saying let him be on time as always.

This shouldn’t be viewed as him an Authoritarian. All these are such happy moments where the mother is little over charged with emotions as her all those years muted child has a come up with a voice.

Without Avaz I would not have understood that there are actually days he wish not to do his favorite activity.

Earlier it was like everyday swimming for Sivaa irrespective of the climatic conditions thinking that it’s his favorite activity and he would love to do that at any time. But last week when Kerala was hit with heavy rains, he communicated through Avaz that he doesn’t feel like Swimming.

So Sivaa… My warrior… you take the lead.. I will follow you with a chalk in my hand thinking when and where to draw a line.

Regards

Preetha Anoop Menon

Siblings story.

One fine day after coming from school Siddhu wanted to practice Yoga sessions at home. He took my abs mat and asked for permission. For me anything was fine except the Screen Time. I knew he was feeling very motivated and inspired by his Yoga Master in School. It was a visual treat for the eyes to see him holding breath and doing yoga poses.

Next day he wanted his brother to follow him. As always I was happy seeing his enthusiasm to include his brother in all the activities. But I knew this little one would lose hope soon because I have tried everything and anything with Sivaa and Yoga. Soon the classes began. Sivaa happily sat with Siddhu in the Yoga mat. ”Chetta stretch your legs and touch the feet” Chettan tried to touch but was not able to stretch it like the little one. Yes you can… he pulled his hands forward… Amma why is chetta not able to touch the feet. It’s so easy know. I didn’t bother to answer… So he himself found the answer… I understand Amma.. Sorry… He is different and it’s just okay to be different and grinned at me for an Approval. Chettan that’s okay…we will do an easy one… That’s called butterfly Asana.. Chetta come we will sit like this…bent your leg.. He tried with all his power to pull and bent Sivaas legs.. Oh God why is it not bending like mine… Oh OK leave it… It’s very much OK to be different… Sighed Siddhu.. OK Chettan now you tell me what asana we should do.. Surprisingly Sivaa stood up and stretched his arms out. Siddhu followed him. Then Sivaa lifted his arms up.. Siddhu followed that.. Suddenly Siddhu put his arms out and waved it like a bird flipping it’s wings. Sivaa followed that and started shaking his hands.

I felt happy and proud once again for Siddhu as he didn’t lose hope in Sivaa like me, instead when things were not going out like the way he thought, he quickly changed the strategy and followed Sivaa. Bill Nason always quote on Autism discussion page that we should follow the child and never give up. I have read it thousand times and never understood how it works until Siddhu showed me yesterday.

Next day Siddhu woke up early not to finish his homework but to teach his Acha the Yoga lessons. His Sir has told him that involve your family while doing yoga. Anoop sat with him for lessons. Acha do this.. Sorry Siddhu this Achan cannot do…you know it’s difficult for me to bend and touch the feet for 10 counts. Said Anoop. But somehow he managed to make him do till 2 counts. Now it was butterfly asana. I switched off the stove and went to watch it.. I was sure that Anoop wouldn’t be able to make it. As expected he couldn’t move his leg closer and pose. It will take time for me Siddhu…I’m became old to do all this; excused Anoop. Then came Dhanurasana… Anoop got shocked seeing that.. Ayyo.. I cannot learn everything together siddhu. Let me learn the first two Asanas. Anoop proclaimed like a Master. And he was curious to do Shavasana and I saw Sivaa eagerly joining them.

Later Siddhu came and told me that I have got mistaken in judging his brother. I didn’t understand what he meant by that. Then he explained that it’s not because Chettan is different that he is not able to do things. It’s just because he’s following Achan. They both are fat and are lazy. I had no choice than to laugh out loud to the Witty findings of this little master of the house.

Attached a video of their Yoga session.

Regards

Preetha Anoop Menon

You were born with a difference but you showed the world that you can make a difference.

You proved that there’s a voice for unheard.

You overcome those painful days with a smile on your face.

You destroyed the so called normalities of therapies and set a new framework and guidelines to be practiced.

Yes Siva the destroyer of evils… We are proud of you.

https://newzhook.com/story/kerala-high-court-decision-to-uphold-guidelines-at-therapy-centres-together-we-can

These are the common questions that people ask me when I speak about Inclusion and acceptance of autism.

1.What is Inclusion according to you?tea

According to me,any loving act, gestures or words by a third person acknowledging my child is Inclusion and acceptance. The neighbor who pass through our gate,shows a gestural ‘hi’ at Sivaa, whenever he sits outside. This neighbor has never asked me anything about his diagnosis and I’m unsure as to whether he knows it or not. Surprisingly Sivaa would also wave back and even smiles at him. So that’s inclusion and I would love to see that social connection happening from everyone around.

2. How do I make the people understand my concept of inclusion?
Sorry I’m not an expert in this field. But definitely I’m an expert mother of my child. So I think it’s my duty to make the society acceptable and inclusive for my Child. For that, I use every single opportunity to it’s best. Few months back, my friend invited us to her house for lunch. I didn’t accept her invitation for lunch but I told her I will definitely come with Sivaa and stay there for few hours and would leave before lunch. Why because it was our first visit to her house and I knew Sivaa would find difficult to wait for more than one hour. But I told I will be there for two hours or so and I also told her the exact time I would reach the house . She was one of my close friend and so it was easy for me to make her understand things. Sivaa being a foodie I told her, he would expect a welcome drink as soon as he comes home and also he has that habit of opening fridge which I would be controlling very much but if that sensory need is too much, there is every chance of he making me blindfolded and would somehow try to open it. I also taught her not bombard him with so many questions as to… Do you like this? Do you want this? Unless the situation calls for it. We were given a warm welcome by her but I could see that she was little nervous and uncomfortable in the beginning but soon she became comfortable with my son. Sivaa was also well behaved and later when we were leaving she hugged him tightly and said bye to Sivaa. My eyes rolled with tears because that was the inclusion I was expecting.

3.Does inclusion also gives the right for exemption for my child’s behaviour?

No.. nowhere in the line I meant like that. Yes my son has difficulty in processing and communicating things but that doesn’t mean that his disability is an exemption for his wrong behaviours. The concept of NO has to be taught to him. As a parent I’m accountable and answerable for my child’s acts. Like I told before , its my duty to teach my children( both neuro typical and neuro non typical) as how to behave in a common settings. The way I would be handling the neuro divergent would be different but still it’s my duty to atleast make an effort. If Sivaa likes opening fridge and if he generalize the same outside in my friends house , I should control and avoid such situations. And also if a guest come to our house, he has that habit of trying to peep in to the plastic kits that he or she is carrying. Knowing all these, I shouldn’t allow such situations to happen again. But I should also understand that there are things beyond my control and I would have no clue about it called meltdowns or sensory overload which should be exempted as it cannot be categorized as child’s behaviours. I also believe that if you don’t teach our children the concept of NO and certain do ‘s and don’t s which comes under the socially acceptable protocols, the real inclusion doesn’t happen.

4. What are the challenges that I face while striving for inclusion?

Staring is a common challenge.People stare as if he is from a different species. Apart from that people ask about his conditions and diagnosis in his presence which is heartbreaking. Some other people forgets his age and interacts like they’re interacting with a baby. For some others verbal would be the only form of communication. So they would constantly demand for a verbal response from them. I think it’s too much for our children and they just loose it. A few days back I told my aunt that he started skating. I was feeling very proud while saying that but her reply took me aback. She said whatever he does has zero value unless and until he start communicating verbally.

All these are my personal experiences and views based on my journey through the life of autism. My findings are exceptionally personal and not professional.

Regards

Preetha Anoop Menon

Sivaas swimming sessions started as soon as the school got reopened but we couldn’t take him due to sudden climatic changes and because of that whole family was feeling sick one day or the other during the month of June. Yesterday I was telling Anoop that we should get him back to swimming because he had started putting on weight these days. So Anoop checked with the trainer so that we could start his swimming lessons soon . He goes to swimming at choice school and it’s open to outsiders only late evening. When the trainer said we can bring him anyday, the one who was over hearing the conversation jumped on to Anoop’s lap and said വാടാ അനൂപേ.. നീന്താൻ പോവാടാ… ( come Anoop… We will go for swimming). We all burst into laughter, hearing his immediate verbal response. Even though he is non verbal… He comes out with words and sentences immediately, for some of his most reinforcing things. Usually this happens for edible reinforcers. This would be his first non edible reinforcer response. I have never seen Anoop taking a decision so fast, he immediately switched off the cricket match and got ready with Sivaas swimming accessories. He then very lovingly and gently stroked on his back and said, I don’t really mind what you call me… You call me Anoop or Da.. Or anything… But you should speak… And when you speak, I feel like I’m in the top of this world.

I could see Anoop was overwhelmed with emotions while saying this… The whole house became silent for a moment until Siddhu ran to Anoop and said ഭ ടാ അച്ഛാ പോവാം.. Swimming… Omg😱 lesson unlearnt.

Now it was Siddhus turn to sit on his father’s lap and understand why was that special concession given to his brother. Their arguments and confusions got over only when he heard that sound from the kitchen of me taking the big spatula and that roaring as to who needs to get the feel of heat from big spatula 😉

Video of Sivaa enjoying back stroke and forward swimming..

I have never seen this smiling face in any of the other activities he does. Because of his passion for swimming he learned the skill fast. There wasn’t any trainers who have actually spend time with him for teaching swimming lessons. Why because he was very difficult to be managed by any person other than we parents. One of his sir Mr Josy who had experience in handling special needs children had tried his level best to make him learn the skill but later Sivaa refused to go there. What I found positive at choice school is that they’re very inclusive and that the trainers are very supportive, like they give him a space for doing something he likes. He spend most of his time under the water. His trainer has once told us he has got an amazing talent to hold breath under the water. And they have never forced him. So Soon he learned the skill. At present he has so many admirers in swimming pool, who love to see him jumping from 10 feet.

So let’s us follow the child and forget the disability. Let them enjoy what makes them happy. Let’s us also be inclusive.

Much love to you Sivaa.

Regards

Preetha Anoop Menon

Yes it’s just two months..
Yes it’s just 60 days.

Yes she’s proud, immensely proud of her boy. She recollects…

It all started with an inspirational journey of an empowered mother. The thought that her boy had grown out of her hands and she wouldn’t be able to control him made her curious. But she convinced her husband and soon they started together. He just thought to give it a try. Yes it turned out be his very such experience with his son. He wasn’t mastered the skill. His only experience was those 5 days at Decathlon waiting outside the skating net with his son for their turn . He remembered those painful treading on his legs with those skating shoes. Surprisingly the boy learned to balance soon which boosted his confidence. She soon witnessed a beautiful bond happening between the father and son. She cried silently but her tears wet a tiny hands. The little boy wiped her tears and said you don’t worry. Amma….Soon Chettan is going to master the skill.. She hugged the little boy out joy.

But by the time school reopened and the morning practice ended. It became her duty to make him practice in the evening. One day she thought of running with him holding his hands, to get him know the thrill of speed in Skating. Soon she felled down..but she woke up not caring for her wounds… Everyone who saw her falling asked…Is this skill necessary to survive ? She ignored them..Yes nothing could stop the Mother.

Nothing could stop her from stimulating him. They continued their practice. Even the rains forgot to fall in the month of June.. Finally that day he learned to skate independently. She couldn’t believe herself. She ran and called the little boy to share her happiness. They both ran cheering the boy. Still no one from the neighborhood came for cheering with them. Soon the little boy called his friends to cheer up his brother which made a sound like that of a marathon race.

Yes consistency was the keyword. The boys passion and his father’s dedication made it possible. She has no clue as to how he learned to break and take turns. Yes he learned himself. That’s the skill of the boy.
Never underestimate the boy based on his disability…. Yes focus on the skill. Now they’re all set ready to take the boy to the trainer with pride and prayers to make him master the skill.

Regards

Preetha Anoop Menon

I was having breakfast peacefully after sending both to school, I heard my phone ringing and I ran to pick it up thinking that it was from school. But surprisingly the name showed Najmal, my friend from Law college. We are all so connected through Whatsapp group but never use to call each other. I was little surprised seeing his call. He had called to invite me to his new office in town as he had started Independent practice after a long 10years of tireless internship with an efficient Senior lawyer. I was so happy hearing the news. I felt so proud of him and told him that I will definitely come to wish him good luck. The call didn’t last for more than 3minutes. But It took me to 12 years back where we travelled daily in a train to reach college. It reminded me of those moot court sessions and seminars. And one day how Girishanker Sir scolded him while conducting seminar for using slang language. He was never a bookish boy but always dreamed of becoming a great lawyer. He had an intense passion and dedication for this profession. I remember unlike others, he struggled to clear the papers but once he attained the degree, he was very serious and consistent to his profession. During our first getto a few years back, I heard from few of my friends as to how he has changed and empowered himself as a lawyer. Yes I felt so happy for his achievements in this field. I know his journey was not as easy as I write here. It was a reward for his hardwork, dedication, passion and consistency.

I really wished to go as I set my day we’ll scheduled in advance. I thought of leaving home as soon as children leave to school. I felt so happy and excited thinking of meeting my old buddies. It was a getto only for me because others meet every day or atleast twice a week in courts. I couldn’t sleep out of excitement because I knew I was going to have a blast the next day. They’re all power packed people with so much of positivity. They’re change makers and energy boosters. People usually have a false notion that lawyers speak only about law enforcement but actually they’re law breakers and who find loopholes to get rid of it. At times when I feel lost or totally depressed, I get myself out of it by reading the messages of law groups. I should also admit that actually I started seeing the other side of the coin only while pursuing law degree. We get to know children and even older people from all sections of the society.

As so many thoughts ran through my mind, I heard a sound from other bed as Sivaa coughing which was very unusual and I asked him whether he was fine, he jumped out of the bed and started Vomiting. First I thought it was some indigestion but it continued through out the whole night leaving him totally tired and sleepless.

I took a deep breath and realized that I couldn’t make it up for tomorrow. Early morning I called him and wished him good luck to which he replied that he will arrange a getto soon. I didn’t reply to that as I left the decision to HIM( the final decider of our fate)